Before becoming a parent, I knew there was a world out there that existed that I was completely unfamiliar with. It has its own language, it’s own themes and characters, and of course songs. My God, the songs.  Back then, I didn’t care to become familiar with it. In fact, I was kind of grateful to be oblivious.  But now, I’m afraid we’ve delved head-first into the world that is… children’s television.

From tiny doctors to talking tools, to a team of underwater explorers led by a polar bear with a mustache, kids shows have come a long way from the Muppets and Mr. Rodgers I grew up with. There are British pigs and tiny fish-people. There are talking trains (not to be confused with Thomas the Tank Engine) and talking dinosaurs who ride trains that don’t talk.

I’ve learned a few universal laws of children from these shows so far. For one, kids love trains. They also love songs (or at least I’d hope so because everything just has to be sung. Everything.) And, I’ve learned that Mickey Mouse is universally appealing.

I don’t know what it is about that iconic cartoon mouse that has captured children’s attention and adoration since 1928. Every time he comes on TV to introduce Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Baby B drops what he’s doing and smiles. From what we can tell it is by far his favorite show, which makes me glad because most of the time I don’t really care about what the talking tools and trains have to say.

In each episode, Mickey Mouse and his friends (the familiar Goofy, Donald Duck, Minnie and Pluto) solve puzzles with the help of the invisible anticipated pre-school audience at home, and they always end with- you guessed it- a song.  The hot dog song. And if Baby B could tell you what his favorite song is, I’m sure he would reply, “Hot Diggity Dog!”

Baby B dislikes… getting dressed, changing diapers, being on his back, and strangers.

Drew and I did the math.  A lot of math. The first numbers we ran- the fact that we’ve each moved at least every two years for the past decade. Packing up everything we own in boxes, trucking it to the next destination, setting it back up carefully to avoid permanently damaging the drywall.  I haven’t had a place to return to every night and really call home since I was 18. Well, I’m happy to say we’ve packed for the last time in the foreseeable future.

We’re home.

And we own it! I can damage the drywall if I want! It was a move several months in the making, between visiting a dozen houses, applying for a loan, negotiating a price, and since we still had nearly a month left on our lease by closing, we were able to paint and prep everything the way we wanted- confusing our dog and baby every step of the way. Finally the day came when we packed them up as well, and settled in. *

Our new home is a four-bedroom in a nice neighborhood with two parks and a community pool all less than a block away. It’s got a grass backyard, which in Arizona can be hard to come by.  I’m so excited to think that Baby B will be growing up in a great neighborhood with great schools, in a safe environment with several neighbors around his own age. He’s pretty excited about his new playroom.

 At 7 months, Baby B Likes… crawling, standing, climbing, eating, laughing, swimming, Mickey Mouse, getting tickled, brushing his teeth, and chasing Max.

Baby B Dislikes… naptime, buckles, growing teeth, staying still, green beans, and when Mommy walks out of the room.

 

This month, we gave Baby B a taste of what I like to call “real food.” And boy does he love it! First, it was mashed peas, then squash, then avocado, cauliflower, and carrots.  I wasn’t surprised when he started grabbing the spoon and trying to feed himself!  He’s been holding his own bottle since four months. Up until this month, Baby B has been eating exclusively breast milk, mostly through breastfeeding. It’s an endeavor we embarked upon from day one, just minutes after he was born, and it has been quite a journey.

I will start by saying, I am lucky.  I’m lucky my baby latched just minutes after birth, and hasn’t had any of the issues so many other babies had to deal with just to be able to eat.  I’m lucky that my milk supply has been able to accommodate him without having to supplement with formula. I’m lucky he never had reflux or lactose allergies. I’m lucky to live in a state that protects breastfeeding mothers and to have such a supportive environment around me.  These are just some of the obstacles mothers face every day to simply feed their babies.  Until now, I never realized, empathized, or appreciated the commitment and persistence it takes.  Now I know for every breastfeeding mom, there are ups and downs, there’s joy and there are tears, there is a love for one’s body that is just as powerful as the hate for it the very next day.

A week after we came home from the hospital, the milk came in.  For those who may be unfamiliar, it’s kind of a supply and demand system.  Well, my baby demanded… a lot.  During the course of one night it seemed every 20 minutes he was hungry. I was exhausted. I was in pain. I remember laying in bed, sleep-deprived and practically delirious, telling my husband I didn’t think I could do it. I couldn’t go through life feeding a baby every half hour.  Fortunately, my mom was visiting to help, and reminded me that there was light at the end of the tunnel.  Like everything with a baby, it didn’t last forever.  And looking back, it was the blink of an eye.

After that, the next three months were easy.  Every 2-3 hours he ate.  If we were out, I’d drape a “peanut shell” cover over him and find a comfortable spot to nurse.   It didn’t take long, it was never difficult, and we were a little nursing team.  Then I went back to work.

For the past three months, I have fed baby in the morning before work at 6am, pump at work at 9am, go home and feed him during lunch at noon, pump at work at 3pm and feed him after coming home around 6, and again right before bedtime if he’s still hungry. Feed, pump, feed pump. I read an article recently about being “frenemies” with a breast pump, and completely understand why. Sometimes I feel like I spend half the day attached to a machine.  

Throughout the work-week, my supply diminishes.  Then, it builds up again during the weekend when I put the pump and stress aside.  There are days I try to nurse during lunch but my mind is still on meetings, holding a fussy baby that just wants a bottle.  There are distractions that take baby’s attention away, or schedules that don’t quite coincide, and I find myself spending even more time with the pump. These are the days I don’t feel like such a team. I started taking Fenugreek, an herbal supplement to help boost my supply.  Some weekends I have to pump after nursing to make enough to feed him the next Monday.  Feed, pump, feed pump.  These are the days I have to remind myself, I am lucky.    

But without fail, every night around 2 or 3am, I hear a little cry.  I walk into the nursery, pick up baby and we sit in the rocking chair. He looks up and touches my face as he eats. It’s quiet, it’s dark, and in that moment I’m all he needs. I soak it in and record it in my memory. Because like everything with a baby, it won’t last forever.

At 6 months, Baby B likes… crawling, pulling himself to a standing position, climbing on mommy and daddy, swimming, his blanket, his pacifier, all food especially peas, squash and cauliflower, and babbling.

Baby B dislikes… sleeping, buckles, being on his back, and when mommy leaves the room.

There’s a reason no one remembers being a baby.  It’s hard. It’s confusing. And, it seems pretty painful and frustrating a lot of the time.  Imagine having to shriek every time you go to the bathroom simply so you won’t have to sit in your own filth, or twisting and turning to get to sleep because your muscles aren’t quite strong enough to get you positioned comfortably. Or worse yet- growing teeth.

 

Having gone through labor without an epidural, I can honestly say I know my pain threshold pretty well. That being said, I still hate the dentist and believe that any teeth-related pain I’ve had is up there with the worst pain ever.  I’m so glad I don’t remember actually growing them.  Baby B is now 5 months old, and he’s embarking on that wonderful journey.  At first, it was hard to tell if his occasional increased fussiness was caused by teething. Soon we started to see some clear signs.  

At 5 months old, Baby B likes: biting things, blankets, Max, drumming, eating, and bath time.

He dislikes: sleeping, sitting still, dirty diapers and being buckled in.

Even though teething has been rough at times, he still usually looks like this 🙂

Drew and I are fortunate to live in a very family-friendly town.  You can count on every restaurant to have a high chair and usually outdoor seating.  The parks are clean and on every corner.  Usually my baby is in an accommodating environment that makes me look like a parenting pro.  Sometimes, however, you can’t help but bring a baby where they really don’t belong.  We had a few experiences with this throughout Month 4. Some of which I handled gracefully, others… well… turned out kinda poopy.

You don’t know judgment until you step into an airport terminal holding a baby.  As I watched countless faces turn to despair and dread, I couldn’t help but feel a bit put off.  I held Baby B in the ergo carrier, ready for a red eye flight, and he was nothing short of adorable.  In fact, he stayed that way the whole ride to Florida for our friend’s wedding.  We scheduled the red eye to save time and crossed our fingers he’d sleep the whole way.  I should’ve crossed both hands because while he slept in my arms peacefully the entire duration, I sat stationary and wide-eyed, unable to move lest I wake my sleeping angel.  For those of you who may not have flown in awhile, let me warn you they are making newer planes progressively more uncomfortable. By the time we arrived I felt like a Picasso painting.  It took several hours for everything to move back into place.

The wedding venue was beautiful. Stain glass windows, 20-foot ceilings, sleek wooden pews, and the echoes- you could hear a pin drop in that place a mile away. I bet a baby’s cry would resonate for days.  I carried Baby B in his suit, and sat down to see the bride come down the aisle.  It was to be a traditional Catholic service. We watched Drew and the rest of the groomsmen take their places along with the groom, listened to the music begin and enjoyed the processional.  Being a former bride myself, I knew exactly what to do the second the priest started speaking.  We snuck out the back.  I wasn’t going to distract everyone with fidgeting and fussiness during an hour-long service.  We played on the steps of the cathedral until just before the bride and groom were announced.  We saw the best parts.  Afterwards when guests complimented my baby for being so remarkably well-behaved, I smiled and nodded.  Parenting win.

My son is not a fan of shopping.  We’ve had a few excursions end abruptly for one reason or another, but a particular trip to Target had me literally out of  breath either from embarrassment, stress or laughter. I can’t decide.

It was nap time and he usually falls asleep in the car so I thought my plan of leaving during his nap and having him sleep through all of my errands was fool-proof.  Except that when we arrived at the store he was still wide awake.  We made it through several aisles before he got fussy and wanted to be held, leaving me with a baby in one hand and cart in the other, awkwardly pushing it slowly toward the register.  When he calmed down I put him in his carrier and that’s when I heard it.  “gurgle.” The familiar sound of a full diaper.  I figured I was on my way out, I could change him in the trunk of my car (which he prefers over the fold-down changers in store bathrooms for some reason) and we’d be on our way.  As soon as he was laying down and I lifted up his onesie I saw we had the most major blowout I’ve ever seen.  POOP EVERYWHERE.  I pulled out two wipes and realized they were my last ones.  Using every scrap of wipe, I’m cleaning poop off my baby, my car, his changing mat, etc.  Only having two hands, I tossed the soiled onesie onto the roof for a moment while I put on baby’s diaper.  But a moment was all it took.

A gust of wind took the onesie, with all of that poop, and it blew away into a nearby parking spot.  There I am holding a naked baby in the trunk of my car staring in shock at a poop-covered garment completely out of reach.  I diapered the baby, picked him up and went after the onesie.  After I retrieved it and threw it in a plastic bag I still had to dress the baby, buckle him in, load all the merchandise, and pray he’d finally take that nap.

At 4 months, Baby B is 16lbs 5oz, 25.5 inches tall.  He’s in the 75th percentile and has hit all the major milestones including rolling over both ways, standing and sitting with some assistance, giggling, grabbing his hands and feet, and blowing raspberries.

Baby B likes: tummy time, music class, pooping, eating, meeting new friends and family members, and traveling.

Baby B dislikes: sleeping, mittens, and the garbage disposal.

When I was a kid, my mom sang all the time.  We sing to the radio in the car like lots of people do, but she also constantly sang made up songs around the house.  She’d sing about any menial task from doing the dishes to folding laundry.  I always thought it was a personality quirk. Now I realize, it’s because she had kids.

Baby B loves listening to music and it often calms him down or eases transitions or just enhances playtime.  It’s resulted in a very “Glee” lifestyle.  I find myself singing all of the time whether it’s a lullaby to help him nap, a song and dance to make him smile, or my favorite- a made up tune desperately sung to distract him from crying.  This is where the improvisation skills really come into play as I create such hits as, “Let’s get Dressed,” or “It’s Sleepytime,” or the more impatient remixed version, “Why Won’t You Sleep.”  The worst part is when my own made up songs get stuck in my head, causing me to mumble out loud in public, phrases like, “Watch your mobile while I go to the bathroooooom.”

As much as my singing makes him smile, his newly found giggle is truly music to my ears.   At three months, he is a strong healthy baby with an ability to learn so quickly that I find it amazing.  We are now enrolled in a music class called Musicology and he loves it! Well, he loves the parts of class he participates in while he’s awake.  Let’s just say he’s not the best student yet.  He must get that from daddy.

At three months, B likes: color contrast books, flying like superman, his soft teddy bear, looking at his feet, and making new friends.

He dislikes: naps, the blender, sneezes, and Postino after 7pm.

Time is flying by and our baby boy is already two months old! He’s hit every developmental milestone for a 2-month-old so far, and in true Bautista fashion he is going above and beyond to meet a few of the 4-month milestones, including bearing weight on his legs in a standing position and rolling over.

Right now, Baby B’s life is full of firsts.  Unfortunately, he caught his first cold a few weeks ago, but he’s better now! He also rolled over for the first time on March 24th, and has done it several times since.  A couple of days later, he started smiling back at us for the first time!  He moves so quickly it’s hard to catch on camera, but I got a few good ones:

You can see his little personality starting to show.

Baby B likes: bathtime, music, stories, his gym, tummy time, stroller rides, car rides, mirrors, and his hands.

He dislikes: naps, bright lights and dirty diapers.

This week is another first: meeting his Uncle Phil, Aunt Leo, and his twin cousins! 

I can’t believe Brayden is already one month old! At his one-month appointment he measured 22 inches, and weighed in at 10lbs 10oz. He’s in the 80th percentile for height, weight and head circumference.  Big boy! 

For the past month, I’ve been home every day taking care of him, but I haven’t been alone.  As they say, “It takes a village to raise a child.” Well, we brought the village. Brayden is lucky enough to have three sets of grandparents who love him very much.  They have been visiting in shifts, bringing their baby-raising expertise to help out the newbie parents:

Eat, Sleep, Poop.  That’s what everyone told me was the extent of a newborn’s repertoire.  Our baby has the eating and pooping down like a pro, but a couple of nights this past week had me wondering if I’d unknowingly given birth to a vampire.  Instead of sleeping, he’d much rather do this:

I can’t believe it’s been almost two weeks since Brayden’s arrival made us a family.  He is settled in and adapting to the world very well so far.  Today’s pediatrician appointment revealed he is now 9lbs 4oz and in the 75th percentile for his size.  That’s a lot of growing in just two weeks! With breast-feeding, sleeping and even focusing and following objects with his eyes, Brayden is pretty much a pro at being a baby.  Drew and I on the other hand, had a few lessons to learn about life with a new baby:

1. The inner-workings of the digestive system dominate daily conversations in a way I couldn’t have imagined. I have mentioned pee and poop more times in the past two weeks than a first-grade class clown.
2. Baby boys come with a built-in fire extinguishing system, but it seems to malfunction quite frequently. The slightest false alarm can send it spiraling out of control, unleashing onto my husband’s clothes, the nursery wall, or anything within fountain range.
3. On a related topic, never bend down to lovingly kiss your baby boy on the forehead while the fire extinguishing system is exposed without a diaper.  I nearly caught it in the eye.
4. I have discovered the fastest rate in which I can consume a meal before an inevitable interruption.  For example, a bowl of cereal takes four minutes.
5. I have also discovered the minimum amount of sleep required for my body and brain to function properly.  Failure to meet the minimum requirement results in brief bouts of narcolepsy, usually while nursing a baby.

All lessons aside, Brayden has his dad’s laid-back disposition and has only kept us up for a few nights so far. (knock on wood!) He’s already developing a little personality. 

Brayden likes: footie pjs, blankets, sleep sheep, playing with mommy’s hair, peeing on daddy, eating and sleeping.
He dislikes: diaper changes, being naked, seatbelts and mittens.

A few friends had asked us what it’s like to know that from now on there are three of us instead of two, or whether it’s strange to go from just us, to us and a tiny human that will be involved in our lives forever.  To me it doesn’t feel strange. In fact, as soon as he arrived I couldn’t imagine life without him. It’s like he’s always existed, but now he’s home.